The other day I saw a picture of a Kate Upton in a formal dress with her entire underboobage exposed, and my first thought was: Where are her nipples? But then I realized she was wearing the most seamless nude bra ever and my second thought was: This woman is the master when it comes to knowing how to work her boobs.Seriously, there’s nothing that woman can’t do with her breasts. Kate Upton has redefined the possibilities of what you can do with a good pair. And it isn’t about turning men on. It’s that she always seems to be getting maximum enjoyment out of her own boobs, which is something to strive for. It doesn’t hurt that she’s well-endowed and well, one of the most beautiful women in the world. No matter what cup size — Itty Bitty Titty Member here! — we can all learn a few tricks from Kate. Click through for some ideas about how to get more creative with your boobs.
Figuring out how to have your breasts be your built in cup holder, means you’ve made it in life. Just think, you’ll never have to find a place to put your drink down when you go to the bathroom ever again.
There’s an art to using your hands as shields and not making your boobs look like sad, smushed flapjacks. Please note how Kate pushes under and up while laying on her back. She does a better job with her hands than just about any push-up bra. Save your money on bras — just use your hands.
Leave it to Kate to develop a new method of horseback riding that’s more boob friendly. Not only does she not have to wear a bra, but she doesn’t have to worry about any uncomfortable bounce.
Gift Wrap ‘Em
Breasts are a gift that you share with the world if your Kate Upton, or with a lucky few if you’re not a model. Either way, wrapping them up in a low slung towel like a Christmas present (the way Kate did before theVanity Faire Oscar party) will only make them seem more precious. Even if you just do it for yourself post-shower, pre-going out.
The best part about Kate’s sexy Easter video, is that she uses her cleavage as a purse. Granted, she’s in a bunny costume and you’ll probably never to need to carry an egg around with you, but the idea is solid. Especially if you’re going out for the night and don’t feel like carrying a bag.
Both in her Carl’s Jr. commercial and her GQ cover, Kate uses her boobs to catch any crumbs or spills. She must never have to do laundry! This would be a game changer for a mega-klutz like me. I suppose the more flat-chested of us would have to lean back to get the full benefit of the boob napkin, but if that means never ruining another pair of pants, fine by me.